Downsizing

S: We have some bad news.
P: Huh?
S: You are no longer.
P: What?
S: We are downsizing, you see?
P: What are you talking about?
S: You used to be one of them but you are not.
P: One of whom?
S: Planets.
P: Planets?
S: Yes.
P: I am a planet.
S: Not anymore.
P: What???
S: We decided that you are no longer a planet.
P: What???
S: Sorry, times are tough.
P: But ... you can't do that!
S: We can and we did.
P: But ...
S: Now, we need to go to another exciting scientific conference. Good bye.

Failure

So I get this email from my lovley wife that reads:

Subject: something to make you laugh

Message:

Go to google and type in the word failure

So I did and I almost fell off my chair onto the floor!

Just in case the Google search engine gods get punished for showing the truth, here is a capture of what the search results were.

The Dog Whisperer

We have been watching this fantastic TV show called "The Dog Whisperer." it depicts Cesar Millan sharing his extensive knowledge of dog psychology. We have three dogs now, and they all have some sort of minor disciplinary problem. We have learned a great deal from watching the show. The most important thing is to start by exercising with the dog to use up some of its energy. The next thing is to discipline and train the animal with a calm and dominant attitude. The dog needs to know that you are the alpha, the dominant member of the pack. The whole things revolves about how your energy will influence the dog's energy -- if you are calm/dominant then the dog will be calm/submissive. The third stage is to reward the dog, mostly with praise and love. We strongly recommend that you watch this great educational show.

Information Overload

I think we are seeing the nastiest symptoms of information overload. Not only are we personally being seriously affected by too much information, our whole society is being overwhelmed by all the data it has to manage. For example, there is the unbelievable number of laptops being lost everyday that contain confidential information. Despite all the publicity that highlighted the problem in the last few months, we are still experiencing data security breaches due to laptop theft or loss. Another example: government agencies are unable to safeguard valuable data. NASA is the latest victim as it confessed to have lost magnetic tapes of man's first moon landing. Not only are the tapes lost, but NASA's attitude about these important and historical objects reflects how overwhelmed we are. The spokesman stated: I wouldn't say we're worried -- we've got all the data. Everything on the tapes we have in one form or another. Unfortunately, the quality of what we got is seriously degraded from the original. The spokesman also said it is possible that the tapes will be unplayable even if they are found because they have degraded significantly over the years -- a problem common to magnetic tape and other types of recordable media. Which to me indicates potential mismanagement of these valuable data holders. I bet we would not be hearing the same non-chalant tone if the Declaration of Independence was suddenly lost. Nevertheless, it is perhaps time to re-examine our world, our priorities and our methodologies -- and it is definitely time to simplify our lives. I do believe this train is a bit out of control.

About values

What do you value? Our values are the things that guide us during all decision-making, small and large alike. It is our values that help us determine what is wrong and right, and what the best course of action is in different situations. Only after we are completely clear on what our values are that we can begin to decide what our mission in life is, what our goals are, and how to achieve those goals. It is extreme differences in values that cause significant human conflict. It is ignorance or vagueness of our values that cause us to act inconsistently and erratically. Do you need help clarifying your values? Creating an Ethical Will may be helpful in determining what things are important enough for you so that they will drive the rest of your life. You can download the software for free (it is ValueWare -- you pay as much as you think the software is worth to you).